My Journey

in Poetry 

This was the first time I ever memorized and delivered one of my poems. I had one day to memorize my poem, The Insurgence, for the Women's March. Everything that could go wrong the morning of did, and I had every reason to back out but I pushed through and made it five minutes before I went on stage with my two babies right next to me. I was sweating from running with my children almost a mile away from where we parked but I looked out at the crowd of 8,000 people and saw my two little babies watching me and knew that this was a moment. Delivering this poem is still one of my proudest accomplishments not only because of the amount of people but because of all the obstacles I went through to even get to the event. I believe that when you're doing something that will change your life and possibly others there is distraction energy sometimes thrown into your space to stop you. My message is to stay focused and push through. 

RISEN

From the depths of the mud she came
to this world,
and from the depths of the mud they thought she'd stay.
Surely they'd say
the stickiness of the thick mixture 
of the dirt and water 
would always bring her down....
there's just no way.....
With diseases,
addictions,
family disruption,
demons lurking
in the murky mud of hell......
still she would not let their words
spell out her future,
and from the depths of mud she sculpted herself. 
Fighting through with all she had was just preparing her for the hard climb.
And even when life hit her down 
shed get up every time.
She rose from the depths of the mud to tell every one that

just because you're born in it you don't have to stay living in it. 
The dirt will stain,
the mud will stick,
the climb will leave scars,
and it's good to feel it all,
because it makes you who you are .....
The choice to rise,
the choice to fight,
the choice to cut those chains that tie you down 
is yours and yours alone...
It only takes one minute 
to make the life altering decision.......
that just because you're born in it you're not going to stay living in it.

I AM

I've been a good woman.

I've been a bad woman.

I've been a hurtful woman.

I've been a selfish woman.

I've been a delusional woman.

I've been a gullible woman.

I've been a cheating woman.

I've been a neglected woman.

I've been an abused woman.

I've been a hated woman.

I've been the other woman.

I've been the picture perfect woman.

I've been a sad woman.

I've been a lost woman.

I've been a found woman.

I've been a Christian woman.

I've been a sinning woman.

I've been a partying woman.

I've been the woman turned to mother.

I've been a woman that is a step-mother, loving them like no other.

I've been a woman taken advantaged of.

I've been a woman that took advantage.

I've been a secretive woman filled with mysteries.

I've been a woman that makes a home out of a house.

I've been the woman that's left the home and now it's just a house.

I'm an imperfect woman

reborn through her mistakes,

and now I'm a very wise woman.

Secrets of a Single Mom

I just want to hide in a corner and cry,
and sit with my head in my knees
in the darkness
sobbing
for no one to see or hear.
With hopes that one day it'll all disappear,
and this will be a bad dream.
 
I just want to hide in a corner and cry.
Let it all out of me,
scream and plead to God for mercy
and forgiveness,
for answers to all my questions,
and one last chance to correct this mess.
 
I can't hide in that corner and cry.
See,
I have these little eyes watching me.
So, I muster all the strength that I have,
sending away my feelings to that small corner of my mind,
where they can stay and cry without me,
and I go on
like a soldier called to his duties,
and I survive,
and I thrive,
and I'll catch myself smiling and laughing again,

feeling alive,
but for all of my life I know
there will be this hole in my soul
that you can see through my eyes,
where that corner lies,
and all those feeling will still be there
haunting me.

Woman in th rain

JUST ME

They tell me to get out of my fairy tale world,
not everything is pink and sparkly wrapped in a bow.
They tell me to snap out of my poetry perception of life,
that Romeo & Juliet don't exist,
and it's not real life.
They tell me to stop acting like a queen,
demanding this and that all the time,
and learn to compromise.
They tell me I'm haughty,
a little snobby,
too controlling and bossy,
with an air to my walk.
They say I try too hard to sound smart,
cause I tend to use big words when I talk.
They tell me to stop wearing heels,
to dress casual and relax.
Not every day is dress up.

My response to them is that I'm sorry if you can't see life through the lenses of my eyes,
and understand the beauty and magnificence
waiting to be discovered each day.
That it's real in every way!
If you did,
you'd see that life is poetry,
and is a gift wrapped up in a bow waiting to be opened.
You’d know that Romeo & Juliet type of love does exist,
but you have to be willing to give it in return, sacrifice
and take the time to learn how to keep it alive.
You'd understand that I am a queen,
like every woman is,
and all that I ask for is what I'm willing to give.
You'd understand that it's not the words I use that is the problem,
but the little time you to take to understand them.
You'd see every day is a blessing so why not wear what I love
and look how I feel?

You'd understand that I'm not being controlling or bossy,
but I just know what I believe to be right and true.
Believing in myself doesn't make me arrogant,
but confident,
which is evident,
in the way that I walk and talk,
that you interpret as snobby.


So, the question I have
to the people that want to put me down and
judge every aspect of my character,
is…….
What is really the problem?
Me?

Or something you are fighting inside you?